Tuesday, November 16, 2010

it's been 4 months

I can't believe that it has been four months since my last post. After the IUI #1 did not take - I just needed a breather from all of it. We did not pursue any more procedures - I just wanted to focus on getting closer to the Lord. We have since found a new church - and LOVE everything about it! We have both grown so much in the Lord ... and our marriage is so much stronger than before. I am so thankful that God sends us just what we need ... RIGHT when we need it! My walk has never been closer to Him - and I feel like I needed that season in my life to prepare me to be an even better mommy to my SOON to be babies! (I'm claiming and believing that!)

It has been a very hard few months. My grandfather has continued to fight his battle with stage four liver cancer. He is in his final days of his fight - we called in Hospice last weekend ... and it was a very tough time at home. I flew home to be with my family and to see Pap. He was very doped up and did not even know that I was there ... which made it VERY hard. In the midst of my grandfather not doing well, my gram was also diagnosed with lung cancer (for the second time in her life). Ten years ago she had 1/3 of her left lung removed ... but now it is back with a vengeance. Needless to say - we have had a very tough few months and have tried to make it home as much as possible. It is a 10 hour drive ... so we can't just pick up to go anytime. I have given this ALL to the Lord - and I am trusting that through this ... we will all become closer to Him - which is what He desires!

On the "baby front" - we sort of took a break from focusing on trying ... no we were not preventing it but it did not define us either. We decided that we were ready to move forward to IUI #2 and increase the amount of medicine this month.

I went last Wednesday for them to do the day 3 ultrasound. I had 14 eggs on my left ovary and 8 on my right! Those numbers are ALREADY better than the last cycle!

I have been on meds since last Thursday ... and let me tell you ... I am very emotional and swollen! I have had to give myself a shot the last two days. I have one more shot to go tomorrow - then I head to get my follicles checked on Thursday. My hope is that they are NICE and MATURE ... and they tell me to trigger Thursday or Friday night - that way the procedure will be over the weekend and I won't have to miss any work! Right now - I am just trying to figure out my work outfits day to day because I am having trouble fitting in my pants!

I wanted to see what my symptoms were the last go round - and thought that it was so nice to have this blog to look back on. Even though I don't think that anyone is reading (if you are ... I'd love to know!) it's nice for us to have this documented - to look back on our journey and smile when we can see the Lord's hand in it all!

Zephaniah 3:17
"The LORD your God is with you,
he is mighty to save.
He will take great delight in you,
he will quiet you with his love,
he will rejoice over you with singing.”

Saturday, July 17, 2010

Peace in the Valley

Isaiah 55:8-9
"For my thoughts are not your thoughts,
neither are your ways my ways,"
declares the LORD.
"As the heavens are higher than the earth,
so are my ways higher than your ways
and my thoughts than your thoughts.

Sometimes our plans that we have for our lives don't match up to what God has in store for us. In those times, it's really hard to find peace and to be positive - especially when our plans are such strong desires of our hearts.

This month was not the month for our miracle. God sees the whole picture and knows that there is a better time for this to happen - that right now we need to take the time to seek Him, grow closer to Him, and find His will for our life. We are trusting in Him - and in Him alone - to show us exactly what He has for us. We know that He has plans to prosper us (Jeremiah 29:11) and that we can rejoice in the Lord always!

Thank you for your prayers - we are going to take a break for a while and just focus on our marriage - and our relationships with the Lord.

Saturday, July 10, 2010

July 4th and more!

We had a great 4th this year ... the 4th was really special to us last year because it was our last holiday that we were able to spend together before his deployment. I am really looking forward to the rest of the holidays this year so that we can make memories TOGETHER! :)

This was us on the 4th last year!

We had a great time at a cookout that our friend's throw every year. I actually taught their son last year and just adore his entire family. They have a big cookout and even bigger fireworks! We were up close and personal - had the debris from the fireworks falling on our heads from the sky! It was great - and I got to see some of my kiddos from last year! :)

This has been a VERY busy week. We went in on Wednesday for Daniel's surgery. There were about 10 people there to surround Daniel and lift him up in prayer before the procedure - family, friends, people from church. It was such a powerful moment and we claimed that the Lord was in control and would do great things. We were expecting surgery to last until around 5pm ... but at 2:30 the NP came out to tell me that they did not have to do the rods once they got in there. She said, "We didn't think that Daniel had healed this much ... but once we did the CT scan and got in there we realized we could just do the bone cement and avoid the rods and screws!" PRAISE JESUS! That was such a blessing and relief for us!

We stayed one night (Versus the five that we were prepared for) and by noon on Thursday we were back home with our doggies! He was so excited to be able to get home and see them - and I was relieved that we didn't have to camp out at the hospital again. He is still in some pain - mostly from his incisions. We go back on Thursday to have his staples removed and we are hoping that this will be the only thing they have to do!

On Friday - our sister-in-law was scheduled to be induced! She had another week or so until her due date but her back was giving her a lot of trouble so they scheduled her induction. We were so excited to become Aunt and Uncle again - for the third summer in a row!

Meet Bailee Grace Peal!

Here is Daniel - in his brace and on his pain meds - but he couldn't keep his hands off of her! :)

Here I am - just as excited as can be!

So we have had a very eventful and busy week! I am thankful because it helped the first half of the 2ww to fly by! I know this week will be a different story. My parents are coming down for the day from Ocean Isle - so that will be a nice treat. As for this week - we really don't have anything planned other than his staples coming out on Thursday. By Thursday - I'm sure that I will have broken down and POAS. We will see - Please continue to pray for God's miracles and blessings ... If you are reading our story - please leave us a message/comment of encouragement. It's always encouraging to hear from others that have walked in our shoes or in the midst of the same storm!

Sunday, July 4, 2010

While I'm Waiting ...

It's been a LONG four days - I have been trying my best to keep my mind off of everything but MAN it's been tough. I'm hoping that the second week of the wait will go by much quicker and easier - since I will be busy taking care of Dano.

We had a WONDERFUL day on the water yesterday. We went fishing in the Charleston Harbor and took our dear friends, The Gleasons, with us. They have the most precious children in the world - and they are such an encouragement to us! It was so nice to get away from the everyday routines (laundry, dogs, etc.) and just spend the day on the water ... admiring God's amazing creations!

Here's a picture of Daniel and Lisa - with our first shark of the day!

Here's a picture of me with
one of their girls!

Here's a view of the Cooper River Bridge from the boat!

It was a wonderful day! I am so thankful to be able to live in such a beautiful place - and to stand in awe over my Lord and Savior and all that He has created!

I'm waiting
I'm waiting on you Lord
and I am hopeful
I'm waiting on you Lord
Though it is painful
But patiently I will wait

Wednesday, June 30, 2010

I just need ONE!

Well - I got a phone call around two o'clock Monday afternoon ... telling me that my level wasn't quite high enough and that the nurse thought that we would wait to do the trigger shot on Tuesday and IUI on Thursday. She said she wanted to run it by Dr. Patton - and she would call me back. About 30 minutes later - she called to tell me that Dr. Patton is very impressed with my ultrasound/follicles and he wanted me to trigger TONIGHT! So we did the shot around 12:30 am - and let's just say ... I had a melt down. I was very overwhelmed and felt really anxious /scared /upset / nervous. It was really hard for Daniel - to see me like that and to stay patient. He got really frustrated - but I tried to explain to him that I just felt overhwelmed. I had not cried at all before this moment - through the whole thing ... even the medicine didn't make me emotional - so the shot sent me over the top. After I pulled it together - it was nothing.

Tuesday was a pretty uneventful day - tried to take it easy because I figured that would be best. Tuesday night - we were SO happy! GO COCKS! Gamecocks won the CWS - and it was the BEST baseball game that I have ever seen in my life! So intense - you could definitely tell the best two teams were in the end - it was tied 1 to 1 and they went to 11 innings! It was really good - we were up late because we were so fired up after the win!

We had to be at SEFC by 10:30 this morning ... collection at 10:30 and procedure at 11:30. Everything went really well - Dr. Patton said they usually like to see 10 million "swimmers" after the wash but that some men have more than that ... "like your husband - who had 74 million swimmers!" My jaw dropped. I looked over at Daniel and he was just SMILING and giggling - like he was "the man " or something. I couldn't believe it - and then Dr. Patton said "That poor little egg - I don't know what it's going to do!"

I was trying to be as positive as possible - even though there was only one mature follicle on Monday. Pam (our nurse) kept saying, "It only takes one!" so we'll see! In my mind - I can't imagine 74 million swimmers and not ONE of them sticking it out. I really hope that this is it - I am going to try my best to stay busy and find things to be focused on OTHER than this terribly long 2ww.

Daniel goes tomorrow for pre-op for next week's surgery. They called today to give us the scoop - we'll have to be there by 9am on Wednesday... bloodwork/prep until 11:00. The surgery is at 11:30 and will last 4 hours! Then he'll go to recovery for an hour ... so I'll have a LONG day waiting! Luckily we'll have our own private room for the 3-5 day stay. I am already starting to pack things that I'll need to keep me sane! At least that will help some of this long wait to go by - I'll be a little busy taking care of him! :)

Please continue to pray that the Lord will prepare my body and bless us with the miracle that we have waited for. I am praying that this will be it - and that two weeks from now I'll be the happiest girl in the world :)

Monday, June 28, 2010

Pray Without Ceasing!

IUI #1 Update

We went this morning for another ultrasound to measure everything and see how my body has reacted to the medicine. I had one follicle that was "really ready" and measured at 18! They said that they want the follicle to be "mature" at 18-22 ... so it looks like we're in good shape. I had some blood work done and they are going to call this afternoon to let me know if we need to do the trigger shot tonight or wait until tomorrow night. I am really hoping that we trigger tonight ... that way our procedure will be Wednesday morning. I am trying my best to stay positive and keep my eyes focused only on the Lord. I know how easy it is to listen to that little voice inside that tries to get you to doubt things - that this is a waste of time, getting my hopes up for nothing, and that I'm jumping the gun on God's plan. There are times that I feel like I am going with what I want - instead of what God has planned. My pastor reminded me that we can't take anything "out of God's hands" or "get ahead of God". He is ALWAYS in control - and whatever happens can only happen because He has allowed it to happen!

Please pray that we will stay positive and that we will continue to seek the Lord throughout the whole process. I am really hoping that we will have our miracle at the end of all of this - but praying that the Lord gives me peace and comfort in whatever outcome! I have found so much peace in reading blogs of other couples that have faced the same things that we are facing now. It is so encouraging to read the stories that end with little miracles ... and my heart is so burdened with those couples that are still waiting on their answer to their prayers.

Along with our IUI this week, and the dreaded 2ww we have ahead of us, Daniel is having back surgery on the 7th. His back has still not healed from the accident in March. His back is starting to slightly collapse and he is still in TERRIBLE pain - so they are going to put in rods and screws into his spine to support his back.

Please pray that the surgeons will have steady hands and clear minds as they operate - as well as a quick and easy recovery. I pray that the Lord uses our time in the hospital for us to witness to others and share His love.

We have a lot going on right now but we are confident that the Lord is going to be faithful and answer our prayers ... even if it's not exactly the way we want them answered.

Proverbs 3:5-6

Trust in the LORD with all your heart
and lean not on your own understanding;
in all your ways acknowledge him,
and he will make your paths straight.

Tuesday, June 22, 2010

Where we stand!

I thought that I would give a little more details on our journey with our first IUI so far. We went Sunday morning for a ultrasound - so that they could check for cysts and make sure that everything looked "normal". GREAT NEWS - NO CYSTS!!! We were so excited to hear Cheryl tell us that! Especially since last month, in May, I had to go to Emergency Care for abdominal pain and they found another cyst that they were concerned with it's size. Looks like my body absorbed it on it's own this time!

Sunday was day 3 of my cycle - so they want the lining of your uterus to be 7mm or less. Mine was 3.8! So far so good ... They also checked for follicles. Ideally, they want each ovary to have 8 follicles. I had 7 on my left and 8 on my right! All in all - I had WONDERFUL news and everything looks perfect to start the process! Now we wait for next Monday (6/28) to go to measure eggs and see where we stand. We are hoping that my lining has thickened and the eggs measure perfect! We know that God is in control and all things are possible through HIM and HIM alone!

Medicine really hasn't had any side effects so far. I am on day three of Femara and really haven't felt too different. I am thankful for that - and I'm sure Daniel is, too! :)

I just got back from a morning run. It was really relieving - even though it was already 100 degress outside. Gotta love the SC weather! While I was running - my inspiration song came on. This song has seen me through my battle with infertility and everytime I hear it - I cry and feel so overwhelmed with the presence of the Lord. I know for sure that He is speaking to me through this song everytime it plays. I'm sure I looked crazy - dripping with sweat and teary as I ran through the neighborhood!

"I will move ahead
bold and confident.
Taking every step
in obedience."

Monday, June 21, 2010

Our Journey to Three!

To say that we have been on a roller coaster the last few months would be an understatement. Daniel returned from Afghanistan in February after a six month tour. Six weeks after his return, he was in an ATV accident and broke his back in two places and a rib on his left side ... the day that he was getting out of the Marines for good. We thought that we had finished our time in the Marines - even after a recall in September 2008. We knew that God had a plan and a reason that He brought us back to the Corps - but had no idea that we weren't finished with the Marines yet! After his accident, the Marine Corps has decided to medically extend him at least through the end of the year. So for the last three months, we have been running the roads to different doctor appointments. In the midst of those appointments, the neurosurgeon found a spot on his back that was the beginning stages of melanoma. Praise the Lord - after have a 4 inch chunk cut out of his back - results came back and everything is clear! We are now awaiting a surgery date in the next few weeks for the neurosurgeon to insert rods and screws into Daniel's spine. His body isn't healing the way they were hoping that it would - so they are going to try to relieve some of his pain by doing this surgery.

In the midst of all of this, we have been trying to get pregnant since the beginning of 2008. I have been diagnosed with Endometriosis and had two surgeries to remove a cyst and polyp. In between all of this, Daniel was in LeJeune/Afghanistan from April 2009 - March 2010, so we are back on full time trying! :) Since his return in February, we have been charting and testing and trusting in the Lord's perfect timing. After many prayers and seeking His will, we are beginning our journey with fertility treatments this month with our first IUI cycle. Daniel continues to encourage me and has confidence that this will be our last month of hoping and waiting. I started taking Femara on Sunday and will continue taking it through Thursday. On Monday, we will head back to get another ultrasound to measure eggs and set up the day for the procedure based on how my body has prepared itself. I am fully trusting the Lord through this - even though there are moments of fear and anxiety. I know that His ways are higher - and that He has plans to prosper us! Even if our plans don't exactly match His ... we are fully trusting Him to provide the desire of our hearts to be parents!

We will definitely keep this updated along the way ... and can't wait to look back on all of this to see the Lord's hands at work! We decided to start this blog to document our journey to three - and all of our blessings that come along the way!